Where do managers usually go wrong in giving performance feedback?

Question

Description:

I just had another feedback session where my manager mostly focused on vague negatives and didn’t mention any strengths or ways I could improve. It feels like they come to these meetings unprepared and just want to check a box, rather than actually help me grow. This keeps happening across different teams too, so is this a common thing with managers? Where are they missing the mark when it comes to giving useful performance feedback that actually motivates employees instead of just stressing them out?

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Anonymous 27 May 2026

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Feedback sessions turn into stress fests when managers come in with just “you need to do better” and no real examples or clear steps. Seen it happen loads—if they don’t prep by tracking actual wins or setting concrete goals, it feels like a box-checking exercise. When I got fed up with that, I started sending simple progress updates before meetings; forced my manager to actually talk specifics. That changed the vibe quite a bit.
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Anonymous 31 May 2026

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Managers fall into the trap of focusing solely on what went wrong because it’s faster and feels productive. They skip concrete examples and leave out strengths to avoid the effort of meaningful conversation. This approach kills motivation—without clear actions or balanced praise, feedback becomes just needless negativity. The real failure is treating these sessions like a compliance task instead of an opportunity for growth, which requires preparation and specific, actionable insights that many managers simply don’t bother with.
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A. D. 27 May 2026

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Most managers treat feedback like a chore—show up, dump vague complaints, skip strengths, no actionable advice. It’s not about helping you grow; it’s about covering their ass in HR files. Real growth needs specifics and balance—something they rarely prepare for or prioritize because soft skills aren’t measured on quarterly reports.
7
J. J. 2 Jun 2026

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Feedback sessions I’ve been stuck in where managers only dropped vague negatives usually came down to zero prep and a fear of awkwardness, so they stuck with broad complaints and ignored specifics or positives. When they’d actually list 2-3 clear examples and paired that with something I did well, even a tiny thing, it made the whole thing less brutal and way more useful for me to tweak stuff next time. That combo took them maybe 10-15 minutes prep but cut a lot of stress from these chats.
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Accepted Answer · 2026-05-31T09:46:25+00:00

Managers often skip prepping and lean heavily on vague negatives because it’s easier than digging into specifics. They forget feedback isn’t therapy; without actionable points or mentioning positives, it just feels like criticism for the sake of it. Some probably avoid real talk to dodge uncomfortable conversations or because they have zero training in this stuff. Expecting motivation from that is... optimistic at best.